The Language of the Lying Cats
by AllBlueChaser
Summary: On backwater planet a race of felines meets with some trouble and one kitten meets two of the best bounty hunters in the galaxies. A lying cat origin story featuring The Will and The Stalk.


Their planet was rarely visited and rarely thought of. A tiny piece of rock in the galaxy no one felt the need to bother with. Wind blown mesas, colorful clay mud flows, and wet root jungle. Some idiot visitor long ago named it 'that damn cat planet' in their own tongue and its inhabitants 'those damn cats'. The idiot thought that just because those damn cats did not speak, they did not understand his language.

Those damn cats understand every language. Even language far a field of those of the vocal and audible range, elders can understand. Beyond simple understanding, those damn cats could even tell the feelings and truths imparted through the language, because as all higher beings know, language is alive. Alive and friends with those damn cats as it turns out.

Another visitor arrived on planet not so long ago. Began stealing those damn cats food.

Those damn cats do not speak to beings beneath them. It is improper. It is forbidden. Only your dearest and precious pride family should hear your base physical re-verb of language.

The visitor started killing them. Those damn cats fought with teeth and claw but the visitor was from a world at war and too well armored and the cats now, too poorly fed.

Another visitor ship arrived- those damn cats feared the worse.

Their murderer yelled to the ship to leave. That he would kill them. (Uncertain. He would try.)

A female with many appendages climbed out of the ship without concern, checking her notebook for particulars. She told the man he was as good as dead. (Truth.) That he was wanted by the Ill-tempered Carplesstess Regent or representative thereof (Truth). That he better get on her ship before he killed The Will's buzz and he started on her stash of the good stuff or he'd regret even more coming to this backwater little planet. (Truth.)

The murderer slowly went for his weapon as he said he was not afraid of her, the famous hunter, The Stalk. (Lying) That she wouldn't take him in alive.

The murderer fell to the ground dead as a quick silver tip from an expandable lance pierced his wobbly fish-like throat with a very loud SHhhhrulrp!

(Truth.)

The male, The Will was at the end of the lance, lips pressed to a bottle of something strong and sweetly bitter.

"You owe me. He was worth more than 700 more if the bastard made it back to Carplesstess in one piece." The Stalk sighed in mock irritation, an arachnid leg coming up to smooth her perfect hair. (Truth.)

The Will knocked his head in this damn cats direction. The many red eyes of The Stalk slid over to the tiny cage and the bloody thatches the murder has started slicing into the light greenish blue skin of this cats back just before their arrival.

"He did that to a kitten. " (Truth.)

"And worse. " The Stalk confirmed as she took in the landscape littered with decaying and mutilated feline. She couldn't know they were of the kitten's pride but she seemed to harden with the potential knowledge anyway. A laser gun was pulled from her dress and expertly severed the lock from the cage within seconds.

(Truth.)

The Will was bending down and beckoning at this kitten. This kitten was considering biting his face off anyway; the killer of killers is more a threat, not less.

"Shit, you're too kind hearted for this work. You're going to get in trouble for it someday." The Stalk chastised in a twisted pout that seemed in equal parts annoyed and fond.

(Truth.)

The Will deftly reached in and pulled this kitten out, avoiding claws that were released on instinct at the foreign touch. He grinned as he tried to sooth this damn kitten. The Will's eyes spoke, saying he wasn't worried because as long as she was there he'd be fine. And happy. The Will's mouth spoke something else.

"Nah. You got me wrong. A job is a job. I'll be fine. I don't give a shit about anyone. Not you and not weird alien kittens. "

(LYING! LYING! LYING!)

"Lyyying!" This kitten hissed out in a tiny raspy voice, wriggling it's body in the Will's arms, confused. Too loud, that lie. Overbearing and overwhelming. The implications of the truth were deep to this kittens heart too.

Immediately disapproval rang loud in this kitten's thoughts as the elders, that had been left alive and were watching from across the way, severed their ties. The taboo is strong. Those damn cats were not known to speak. To vocalize was sacred, only a damn cat's pride family should hear their words! Their own dance of intimate language blending and bending.

"Did it just talk..?" The Stalk's eyebrows rose in surprise even as the Will looked up and cursed. The rest of the Pride had freed themselves, and was now giving this kitten a meaningful glare as they turned away. This kitten was to be abandoned totally and be taken as an anomaly by others. Outsiders of the outliers must not know they could speak. This one slip had to turn into a bluff and this kitten sacrificed to keep their secret.

They were so very quick to abandon this kitten though.

"You can't abandon it!" The Will yelled at the retreating cats.

"Lying." This kitten growled in defiance. They could and they were.  
It was fine. The elders were not there in it's thoughts when it's back was getting fletched or when it's pride had fallen silent. The elder damn cats were in fact a bunch of assholes.

"Assholes." The Will sneered after them. The Stalk came close and rested her head against the Will's shoulder, taking a softer look at the cat, and humming in agreement. This damn kitten mewed in agreement and maybe contentment as fingers and palms of both came and stroked this kitten's head.

The Will and The Stalk were it's pride family now. Therefore they could hear the word again. Maybe more.

Together their pride family would be happy. Safe. This damn kitten knew it.


End file.
